Fullmetal Alchemist Game Show!
by ShadowHawq35
Summary: Just like the title says. The show where you get to decide! Pretty much crack. Don't like, don't read. All pairings. Rated T because I don't really trust myself to keep this too kid-friendly.
1. Chapter 1

Hughes: Hello everybody and welcome to the Fullmetal Alchemist and/or Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood game show! I, lieutenant colonel Maes Hughes will be your host and judge tonight!

Edward: What the hell?! I thought you died!

Hughes: Hahaha! For the purpose of this game show all characters that died throughout either series has magically been reincarnated!

Edward: …

Hughes: Since this is the beginning of this series let me lay down some rules for all you folks reading this right now!

Roy: Quit breaking the fourth wall Hughes…

Hughes: Don't listen to him folks, he's just being a grumpy-poo right now. Isn't that right Elicia?

Elicia: Daddy! You're back!

Hughes: Of course I am darling! So anyway, rules:

1: In this game show you, as the readers, get to choose what kind of fate will befall our favorite Fullmetal Alchemist and Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood characters! Pick two or more characters and some kind of challenge.

2: The challenges can be anything as long as they stay within the rating. No sex scenes. Kissing and love confessions are allowed but slash is just… no. Blood is allowed, but keep it appropriate. We don't want my poor daughter Elicia to see that kind of stuff now do we?

3: Also, if you really want to, you can ask a question that wasn't really answered in the manga or either anime, although you may not like your answer…

4: You, the readers and reviewers have the power. All you have to do is review this story or PM ShadowHawq35 and if she likes your suggestion then a chapter will be made.

Hughes: I can't think of anything else right now… meh, oh well. Why don't we all look at pictures of my darling daughter Elicia!

Everyone: HELL NO!

**A/N: Hello everyone! Shadow here and I just started… I don't know what… but the next chapter will be posted when (if) I get a suggestion from one of you guys or if I come up with something on my own. Either way some serious sh*t is about to go down.**

**I'll be waiting.**

**This is Shadow, signing out. **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Ah, I love you Dragonfire Alchemist. You're just as evil as I am.**

Hughes: Alright! We're back with tonight's first reviewer! Thank you Dragonfire Alchemist! It appears we have a request before our challenge! Here it is folks… A controlled hit over the head with a club for our dearest Shou Tucker! Who would like to do the honors!?

Ed: I'LL WIPE THE FLOOR WITH THAT GREASY-HAIRED BASTARD!

Hughes: Okey doke! Let's start up!

Tucker: *poofs into the fanfiction* woah…. I'M ALIVE!

Ed: NOT FOR LONG!

Hughes: It appears our dear Edward has snatched up the club! He is advancing on Tucker with incredible speed! You can practically see the anger in his face! Of course, I can imagine why after Mr. Tucker decided to transmute his daughter. What a meanie! The clubbing has commenced! Oh….. oh my….. Edward! You were only supposed to hit him once!

Ed: SGFAIGDFKAKHDKFJASDIEYOUDIRT YBASTARDDIEKGFAHFDAHFDSLFHUA LDUJFAHL!

Tucker: *dies*

Hughes: Edward stop mutilating his body!

Ed: *continues to mutilate body*

Hughes: We interrupt this sequence with a commercial break to prevent viewers from seeing this uh… this…. Kind of thing.

Roy: Have you ever wanted to smell like a fire, burning in the night, lighting up the world around you? Well now you can! With the new Roy Mustang cologne you can smell just like me. And who wouldn't want to smell like the sexiest colonel in the entire military?

Risa: Colonel… why are you advertising your smell?

Roy: Oh, lieutenant…. I didn't…. uh…. See you there!

Hughes: OKAY! That's enough of THAT commercial break! Now, onto the challenge! *opens envelope* Dragonfire seems to have a challenge for our dear Edward!

Hughes: Okay, Edward! …. Edward? Where are you?

Alphonse: Oh, uh, brother is kind of destroying Shou Tucker's corpse.

Ed: YOU DON'T DESERVE TO DIE HAPPY YOU FILTHY LITTLE PIECE OF #$%^&*&^%$# !

Hughes: Oh…

Al: Um…. Yeah….

Hughes: Okay, why don't we just skip to when Edward is done then…?

A few days later:

Hughes: Okay, we're back! Shou Tucker is officially a stain on the floor! Like father like daughter, am I right?

Edward: Hughes…. I'm freaking warning you….

Hughes: O-okay, alright! Never mind! Ahem, let's uh, let's get on with this challenge. Edward! Go forth to your colonel!

Ed: …. Fine…. *walks up to Roy*

Roy: Well if it isn't Fullmetal. What do you want, short stack?

Ed: WHAT DID YOU CALL ME!?

Hughes: Alrighty, why don't we just get on with this challenge, hm?

Ed: Okay… fine. What am I supposed to say?

Roy: *smirking like he usually does*

Hughes: Here Edward, why don't I just give you the paper…?

Edward: *Takes paper* Okay, fine. *Reads*

Hughes: …..

Roy: …..

Ed: ….

Ed: No.

Hughes: Aw, come on Ed! It's a challenge! It's for the readers! You don't want to let them down do you?

Ed: I'm not saying this.

Roy: What's wrong Fullmetal? Cat got your tongue?

Ed: Shut up colonel. I'm leaving. *turns to leave*

Al: *steps in front of Ed* Brother please? It's for the readers!

Ed: The readers can go screw themselves if their going to make me say stuff like this!

Hughes: Oh, trust me, it's only going to get worse.

Ed: Okay, I quit. It's official. I'm done. It's over.

Al: Brooooooooooother.

Ed: No Al. I'm not saying it.

Roy: Oh, come on Fullmetal. It's not that hard.

Ed: No

Hughes: Ed….

Ed: No!

Roy: Fullmetal….

Ed: NO

Al: Brother….

Ed: NO!

Riza: Edward….

Ed: What, you too? The answer is still no!

Dragonfire: DO IT EDWARD!

Ed: … fine.

Ed: *turns to Roy*

Ed: *Takes deep breath*

Ed: Imalittleshrimp

Ed: THERE! I DID IT!

Roy: Sorry Fullmetal, but you're so short I couldn't hear you

Ed: Colonel I'm going to kill you. Very soon.

Hughes: Sorry Ed, but you're going to have to say it again…. ^-^

Ed: I ALREADY SAID IT

Hughes: Slower this time…

Ed: I'm…. a little shrimp.

Roy: …

Hughes: …

Riza: ….

Al: ….

Tucker: *Still dead* ….

Al: He…. He's accepting his fate.

Hughes: I thought this day would never come.

Ed: OH SHADDUP YOU BASTARDS!

**A/N: This was actually very fun to write. ^-^ Oh, poor Edward. Dragonfire you evil evil reader. (Then again, I was cackling like a maniac during this whole thing….)**

**WHAT WILL THE NEXT CHALLENGE BE? WHAT WILL WE HAVE TO PUT OUR CHARACTERS THROUGH NEXT? REVIEW AND YOU COULD BE THE ONE TO DECIDE!**

**See you guys! Can't wait to write the next thing!**

**-Shadow**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So originally I was planning on making this a weekly thing, but nothing ever really goes according to plan, huh? I decided to be nice and give you guy's two chapters today BECAUSE I'M FREAKING NICE. This one is for Grizz Lee, thanks so much for your review!**

Hughes: Not even 12 hours after the last chapter, here is the next challenge presented!

Al: I wonder if they're going to give us a break… Brother is still having a breakdown in a corner after the last chapter.

Hughes: Admitting he was short was really that bad?

Al: Yes…

Hughes: Well in any case, let's look at the challenge. *opens envelope*

Hughes: … Oh Roooooooooooooy

Roy: Oh god no

Hughes: Don't worry Roy, you get rewarded for this one!

Roy: Uh….

Hughes: Just call on 200 members of your miniskirt army and we can start!

Roy: You're not even going to tell me what the challenge is?

Hughes: Not yet ^-^

Roy: Alright, fine. If it pleases the readers. *calls up his team and other people*

Hughes: Okay, now just stand in front of this school and wait.

Roy: I have a bad feeling about everything right now.

Hughes: Oh, shtap worrying. It wont be that bad… I don't think.

Roy: Hughes, after this I will burn you alive

Hughes: But I'm already dead!

Roy: Oh yeah, thanks for that by the way.

Hughes: What, thanks for dying?

Roy: Yeah, you didn't even tell me what you wanted to say in FMA or the manga. Then you just went and died! DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT WAS LIKE STANDING AT YOUR GRAVE!?

Hughes: Uh…. Heh heh…. Sorry….?

Roy: *Sighs* I'll yell at you later, right now I have a challenge to complete. What is it anyway?

Hughes: Um… why don't I stand way over there and just read it to you through the megaphone.

Roy: Alright, but I don't understand why you would have to be way over ther-

Hughes: THE CHALLENGE IS FOR YOU AND YOUR MEN TO STAND OUTSIDE OF A HIGHSCHOOL AND WAIT FOR EVERYONE TO COME OUT!

Roy: Alright, that doesn't sound _too_ ba-

Hughes: AND YOU HAVE TO LET THEM TRAMPLE YOU ALL!

Roy: … What?

*Bell rings*

*Roy and men get stampeded by high schoolers*

Hughes: SORRY ROY!

Roy: aiugfagdhkjasrkfahdsgfkjagdf j

Men: igsjhfdakdfiahdfadfjasdfohgo dthepainithurtsohmygodheynic eviewaufdakflakjfdkjlhafl

Hughes: WELL, THAT HAD TO HURT

Al: Yup.

Hughes: WHY ARE YOU SO INDIFFERENT TO ALL THIS?

Al: Why are all your sentences in capitals?

Hughes: I'M TALKING THROUGH A MEGAPHONE!

Al: To the readers?

Hughes: YUP

Al: Um…. Okay

Roy: *still being trampled by highschoolers*

Hughes: Well, Grizz Lee, would you like to give them their reward?

Grizz Lee: No problem. *steals megaphone* HERE ARE YOU DORITOS LOCOS TACOS GUYS! *Uses magical powers and makes doritos locos tacos rain from the sky*

Men/Roy: YAY!

Grizz Lee: MUHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAA *fire comes out of eyes* I HAVE THE POWER

Hughes: This is getting a little insane

Grizz Lee: Not done yet. SEDUCTION POWERS ACTIVATE!

All Female Officers in Military: You know…. I have a sudden urge to wear a miniskirt.

Riza: I never thought I'd hear myself say this, but I think we should all wear miniskirts to work tomorrow.

All Female Officers in Military: Yeah!

Hughes: Unfortunately, Roy and his officers are in the hospital, so they never witnessed the beauty that is military women in miniskirts.

**A/N: …. I think this is officially crack now. Ah, I love torturing fictional characters. So, my plan is to pretty much try to create a chappy for every awesome review, but I can't say how lazy I might become in the next few days. So we're just going to have to wait and see. (btw, I just got 2 new reviews and I'm on a crazy writing streak so don't be surprised if two new chapters come up within the next few hours.)**

**WHAT WILL THE NEXT CHALLENGE BE? WHAT WILL WE HAVE TO PUT OUR CHARACTERS THROUGH NEXT? REVIEW AND YOU COULD BE THE ONE TO DECIDE!**

**See you guys in the next chappy!**

**-Shadow**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Okay, while I was writing the last chapter I got two new reviews that just… Oh my god they were beautiful. I love torturing Ed and Roy. Who doesn't? So here's another challenge/request (I think I'm just going to call them requests now. Makes me feel more powerful.) from Dragonfire Alchemist. I seriously love you bro. (fyi I don't care if you're a girl or a boy, I'm just going to call all my reviewers/readers "bro" because reasons.)**

Hughes: Hello everyone! You miss the short amount of time we were gone? Of course you did! This next challenge is for Roy and Edward!

Ed/Roy: God no

Hughes: Here it is! *opens envelope* Dragonfire Alchemist said: "To apologize for the trauma I put Edward through, here's a little challenge for Roy."

Roy: Oh no

Hughes: "No matter WHAT Edward says or does, you can't say a WORD for five hours! Have fun Edward ;)"

Ed: …This just got interesting

Roy: Oh no. Oh god no.

Hughes: Shhhhh! Roy! Remember, you can't say anything! Your time starts…. NOW!

Roy: *Sits at desk doing paperwork*

Ed: *grins evily* SO COLONEL! I HEAR YOU HAVE A HOT DATE TONIGHT WITH RIZA!

Riza: *Barges in* COLONEL WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN TELLING PEOPLE DO YOU WANT US TO GET COURT MARSHALLED?

Roy: *Shakes head desperately*

Riza: Oh I see how it is…. You're spreading rumors about the both of us just to boost your egotistical reputation around here, aren't you?

Roy: *Still shaking head*

Riza: Alright, fine! Don't answer! But don't be surprised when you find a bullet in your head tomorrow! *Storms away*

Ed: *Whistles* Wow, colonel. You really made her mad, didn't you?

Roy: *Glares and tries to get back to paperwork*

Ed: *Sits on desk* Aw… what is it Colonel? _Cat got your tongue?_

Roy: *Attempts to ignore*

Ed: *lies on paperwork* What wrong colonel? Aren't you going to tell me to get off?

Roy: …

-A few minutes later-

Ed: *Pours bucket of water on Roy's head* HAH!

Ed: *Puts chicken on head*

Ed: *Pokes with broom*

Ed: *Messes with hair*

Ed: *Steals gloves* I wonder what would happen if…. *puts on gloves* I were to do…. This? *Snaps*

Ed: *Takes chair*

Ed: *Throws desk out window*

Ed: *Shreds paperwork*

Ed: *Grabs fire hose* HAHAHAHAHAHHAA *Soaks office*

Ed: I'M BATMAN!

Ed: HAH! DRINK THE MILK! DRINK IT!

Ed: *transmutes office into an Edward style theme* THERE WE GO

Ed: *Sits on Roy* HAHAHAHHAHAHA

Ed: *Shaves head*

Ed: *Pours pickle juice everywhere*

Ed: *Transmutes clothing*

Ed: *Grabs makeup* YES!

Ed: *Glues fake beard*

Ed: AND IN THAT MOMENT! I SWEAR, WE WERE INFINITE!

Ed: ONE DAY MORE TO REVOULUTION WE WILL NIP IT IN THE BUD!

Ed: THEY MAY TAKE OUR LIVES! BUT THEY WILL NEVER TAKE OUR FREEDOM!

Ed: *Graffiti's office*

Ed: *Destroys everything* NOT SO MUCH OF A MIDGET NOW, HUH?

Hughes: OKAY! OKAY! THAT'S ENOUGH EDWARD!

Ed: But…. But…. I was having so much fun!

Hughes: Your five hours is over! Now I would suggest you head for the hills…

Roy: I'LL BURN THAT LITTLE BEANSPROUT UNTIL THERE'S NOTHING LEFT BUT CHARCOAL!

Ed: Oh crap.

**A/N: Dragonfire Alchemist you are a gift to this place we call Earth. **

**WHAT WILL THE NEXT CHALLENGE BE? WHAT WILL WE HAVE TO PUT OUR CHARACTERS THROUGH NEXT? REVIEW AND YOU COULD BE THE ONE TO DECIDE!**

**See you!**

**-Shadow**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I think I'm on a role guys. Okay, so I'm smushing three challenges/requests into one chapter because reasons. So…. Yeah. I have two evil ones, and one ****_really_**** evil one. (You know who you are! O-O) *Warning: Swearing in this chapter… well, more then usual* Alright, The first one is from CrazySarahify:**

Hughes: Okay guys! And our first reviewer this time around is CrazySarahify! Let's see what torturous events await! *opens envelope*

Hughes: … Oh…. *slowly starts to grin* oh yes…

Ed: What is it? *leans over and reads*

Ed: …

Ed: OHGODNO!NO!NO!NO!DAGLFDJHAKFLHDKAHLFADKFALDF!I'DRATHERDIE!NO!YOUCANTMAKEME!

Hughes: Eeeeeeeeedward, it's for the reeeeeeeeeaders!

Ed: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOo ooooo

Roy: What's going on?

Hughes: ROY! Glad you could come! This makes everything so much easier!

Ed: NO! ROY! GET OUT OF HERE! *tries to run*

Hughes: *appears before Ed* Edward…*Dark scary face*

Ed: NO!

Roy: WHAT IS GOING ON!?

Ed: I AM NOT GOING THROUGH WITH THIS!

Hughes: Do you WANT me to bring in the reader?

Ed: YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!

Hughes: Alright Edward… you give me no choice….

CrazySarahify: Edward. Do it.

Ed: But….. but…..

CrazySarahify: Now.

Ed: … fine…..

Ed: *walks up to Roy*

Roy: I still have no idea what's going on.

Ed: You're a…. you're a….

CrazySarahify: SAY IT!

Ed: COLONEL YOU'RE A SEXY BITCH

Roy: …..

Ed: …..

Hughes: *laughing in the corner*

CrazySarahify: EDWARD COMPLETE THE CHALLENGE!

Ed: …..

Ed: *grabs the colonel's shirt*

Ed: *Stands on tiptoe*

Roy: Wha-

Ed: *Kisses*

CrazySarahify: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSS SSSSSSSSS!

**A/N: I should probably just put it out there that CrazySarahify is not, in fact, a Roy/Ed supporter (Neither am I) But just thought it would be hilarious. (I agree) Oh yeah, and sorry, in your review it just said sexy ** so I just filled in whatever swear seemed apropro. **

**ON TO THE NEXT CHALLENGE!**

Hughes: This next review comes from one who goes by the name of Kitten1313! Here it is:

"My challenge is a game of keep away. The characters must keep Havoc from his cigarettes for 1hr, including the one he's already smoking."

Hughes: Well, this just got interesting.

Havoc: *Sitting in the office, minding his own business, having a smoke*

Edward: HAVOC I'VE DECIDED TO TAKE UP SMOKING SO GIVE ME YOUR PACK!

Havoc: …. What?

Ed: GIVE ME YOUR PACK OF SMOKES!

Havoc: Sorry pipsqueak, these things cost money. *waves pack in the air*

Ed: Now, lieutenant!

Riza: *Shoots hole through package*

Havoc: …

Havoc: Seriously you guys? Is this one of those stupid challenge thin-

Roy: *Snatches cigarette from mouth*

Havoc: HEY!

Ed: RUN!

Everyone: *heads for the hills*

Havoc: *groans* Great, now I gotta find another one somewhere.

Havoc: *Goes to store*

Havoc: *Buys more cigarettes*

Ed: NOT SO FAST HAVOC! *Transmutes giant stone fist from ground*

Havoc: What the-

Armstrong: LIEUTENANT HAVOC! I CANNOT ALLOW YOU TO CONTINUE WITH THIS OUTLANDISH BEHAVIOR!

Havoc: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!?

-a few minutes later-

Maria Ross: Um…. Colonel Mustang…. Why is Havoc trying to start a fire in the courtyard?

Roy: I took his lighter from him earlier this morning so now he can't smoke even with the cigarettes.

Ed: IT WAS THAT EASY?!

**A/N: And now for the final (and probably most evil) challenge!**

Hughes: Well, we've had kissing scenes and smoking, and here is the final one from The Electric Alchemist! *Opens envelope*

Hughes: …

Hughes: We can't post this! This is supposed to be a crack fic!

Ed: …. I'm getting worried….

Hughes: Uh…. Ahem, The Electric Alchemist says: "I have a challenge for Al and Ed. It is that they have to say one terribly cruel thing to each other."

**(A/N: I don't know if I'm just reading this challenge wrong, but this may just get a little angsty….)**

Al: O-okay. Brother…. I've always kind of blamed you for the reason I'm this way

Ed: I'm so sorry Alphonse… I know, everything is my fault.

Al: No brother! It's not! The thing is, I blame myself more. I had the bad feeling about everything and I was too much of a coward to act on it.

Ed: What? No! Alphonse you're not a coward! I was the one who came up with the idea, and I convinced you we had to bring mom back! You can't blame yourself!

Al: I'm sorry….

Ed: Me too…

*hug*

Ed: Al, I still blame you for getting me to hate milk.

Al: ED! THAT WASN'T MY FAULT! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO MADE ME THROW UP THAT DAY!

**A/N: I was going to make this all angsty and crap, but I wanted to lighten the mood a little. This is a crack fic, this isn't an angsty brotherly love fic. Sorry, but it's true. I'm okay with taking requests like these, but they might be a little dry because a) when I write this I'm in crack mode, so it doesn't really fit and b) I kinda suck at writing angst…. Sorry, but it's true.**

**ON A LIGHTER NOTE! NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE UP WHENEVER I GET A NEW REVIEW! (so, hopefully tomorrow…. Hopefully…..)**

**WHAT WILL THE NEXT CHALLENGE BE? WHAT WILL WE HAVE TO PUT OUR CHARACTERS THROUGH NEXT? REVIEW AND YOU COULD BE THE ONE TO DECIDE!**

**-Shadow**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Okay, I've never used someone else's OC before, so I apologize profusely if she ends up out of character. **

Luna: Hey guys! I'm Luna, and I'll be guest hosting this chapter's show, as per requested by DarkMistLover12.

Hughes: Wait…. So does this mean I won't get to host this time around?

Luna: Uh…. Yeah…?

Hughes: OH WELL, I'll just have more time to play with Elicia! She's turning four soon, did you know?

Luna: Uh….

Hughes: Good byyyyyyyyyyyyyye

Luna: A-alright then. Let's move on to our first challenge from DarkMistLover12. *opens envelope*

Al: What is it?

Luna: …. I guess we have Al's first challenge!

Ed/Roy: Oh thank god

Luna: Al, you have to go up to Ed-

Ed: NO! MY NAME WAS METIONED! NOOOOOOOOO!

Luna: … and call him short.

Al: W-what? But brother'll kill me!

Ed: No denials of my height?!

Al: I mean, uh… brother isn't short!

Luna: AS HOST! You WILL complete this challenge.

Al: Uh…. Okay…. *Walks up to Ed*

Ed: …

Al: …. Uh, brother. You're short.

Ed: YOU WOULD SIDE WITH THE REST OF THE WORLD AGAINST YOUR OWN BROTHER!?

Al: what? No! it was just a challenge brother!

Ed: WHO'RE YOU CALLING A BEANSPROUT RICE-GRAIN MIDGET WHO CAN'T EVEN ANSWER THE PHONE BECAUSE HE'S TOO SHORT TO REACH IT UP THERE!?

Al: Brother! Calm down!

Ed: I KNEW YOU AND THE MILK WERE IN IT TOGETHER! I SHOULD'VE SEEN THE SIGNS!

Al: Brother you're not making any sense!

Ed: WHO NEEDS SENSE WHEN THE ENTIRE WORLD HAS DECIDED TO GROW WITHOUT YOU? EVERYONE IS JUST TOO DAMN BIG!? WHAT HAPPENED TO THE TIME WHEN WE ALL WERE THE SAME SIZE!?

Al: Brother, please stop banging your head on the pole!

Luna: Alrighty then, why don't we cut to commercial real quick while we wait for Ed and all his attractiveness to get over his minor breakdown?

Armstrong: HAVE YOU EVER WANTED TO CRY TEARS OF GOLD AT YOUR UNTONED MUSCLES? *Sparkles* WELL NOW YOU WONT HAVE TO! WITH THE NEW ARMSTRONG FITNESS PROGRAM, YOU CAN GET BEAUTIFUL MUSCLES LIKE MINE AS IF THEY REALLY WERE PASSED DOWN THROUGH THE GENERATIONS! *Sparkles more*

Fuery: Caution: the Armstrong Fitness program may not be right for you. Please contact your doctor if you are experiencing any of the following symptoms: aching, fever, hallucinations, depression, addiction, stomach aches, cramping, diarrhea, hair loss, hyperactive behavior, or anything else that may be relate to the Armstrong Fitness Program.

Luna: And we're back! With a very beat up Alphonse and an angered (but still attractive) Edward.

Ed: … Attractive?

Luna: ANYWAY, let's get on to our next challenge! *opens envelope* Okey doke, we're going to need Roy and Hughes for this one. Riza! Retrieve your colonel! Gracia! Get your annoying husband out here!

Luna: Okay, let's put our two favorite officers into a tiny room together!

Roy: Oh god. When will this end?

Luna: As long as readers keep reviewing, I don't see an end anytime soon.

Roy: *blinks* Who're you?

Luna: I'm the guest host for this chapter.

Roy: *goes into womanizer mode* Why hello, I'm afraid I haven't seen you in this anime before.

Luna: Uh, I'm an OC from DarkMistLover12.

Roy: That makes sense, after all *sweeps off feet*no one I know could design a woman so beautiful.

Luna: …

Luna: What?

Roy: Surely you must know how beautiful you are.

Luna: Okay, nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Not doing this. Ed is the only one for me.

Roy: …What?

Luna: … oh no did I say that out loud?

Roy: Did you just sa-

Luna: CONTINUING ON!

Hughes: *smiles knowingly*

Luna: Uh… Ahem, anyway. Roy, your challenge is to listen to Hughes ranting about his daughter.

Roy: … For how long?

Luna: *shrugs* however long I want it to be. Byyyyyyyyye! *Leaves*

*yelling and undefinable words comes from the room*

Luna: We'll check back on them later.

Luna: Alright, now for DarkMistyLover12's final challenge! *opens envelope*

Luna: Uh… We don't have to do this one, right?

Ed: What does it say?

Luna: *blushes* NOTHING!

Ed: *steals envelope*

Ed: *reads*

Luna: WE DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS ONE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BECAUSE THAT'S PERFECTLY FINE WITH ME. NOT THAT I DON'T LIKE YOU OR ANYTHING BECAUSE I MEAN I REALLY DO LIKE YOU BUT IF YOU DON'T LIKE ME BACK THEN THAT'S PERFECTLY OKAY AND I'LL JUST CONTINUE ON WITH MY LIFE AS A LONELY SOUL. IT' OKA-

Ed: *kisses*

**A/N: In case you're confused the challenge was for Edward to kiss Luna. ^-^ There's probably going to be another chappy up soon because I seriously LOVE all your challenges for the characters! Next up is…. Another suggestion from Kitten1313, and depending on how long that one is I might do another CrazySarahify one. WHO KNOWS?**

**WHAT WILL THE NEXT CHALLENGE BE? WHAT WILL WE HAVE TO PUT OUR CHARACTERS THROUGH NEXT? REVIEW AND YOU COULD BE THE ONE TO DECIDE!**

**-Shadow**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Okay guys, so I just remembered I forgot to say what happened with Hughes and Roy in the last chapter. Let's just say Roy had a bit of a mental breakdown and Hughes was in the hospital recovering from second and third degree burns. He also had to go to therapy because the majority of his pictures were burned and he couldn't cope.**

Hughes: Hello everyone! It's me back from the hospital and let me just tell you it's not NEARLY as much fun in that place. Sure, there were tons of people in pain, but no one I knew. This request is from the returning Kitten1313. Here is the challenge: *Opens envelope*

"Armstrong, your challenge is very simple, you are not allowed to use sparkles, take off your shirt and can not say "it's been in my family for generations" for 10 hrs if you are unable, Roy you have to burn all his sparkles."

Armstrong: WHAT? BUT SUMMONING SPARKLES IS A TECHNIQUE PASSED DOWN THROUGH THE ARMSTR-

Hughes: Major, remember the challenge!

Armstrong: *grumbles.*

-A few hours later-

Armstong: iaufhdakdfhakgdfkjadfkjgakjf gafhkadfgkadfakkdsfakf

Hughes: You alright there, major?

Armstrong: MY BICEPS NEED TO BREATHE!

-another hour later-

Hughes: How ya doin' Major?

Armstrong: MUST. ELIMINATE. READERS.

Hughes: Woah there, Major

-One hour to go-

Armstrong: THAT'S IT! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! *strips off shirt* THE BODILY STRUCTURE OF THE ARMSTRONG FAMILY WAS MEANT TO BE SHOWN TO THE WORLD! *sparkles* LOOK AT THIS FIGURE! PASSED DOWN THROUGH THE ARMSTRONG LINE, FOR GENERATIONS!

Hughes: Wow Major, you've officially been the first person to fail a challenge.

Roy: Burning time?

Hughes: I guess so.

Armstrong: NOOOOOOOO

Roy: *snaps*

-The sparkles have been burned-

**A/N: Great, now Armstrong is in the therapy room…**

Hughes: Well, onto our next challenge from CrazySarahify! *opens envelope*

Hughes: …. This is going to be fun.

Hughes: CrazySarahify says: "While Ed is sleeping have Mustang take his automail and hide it then make Ed go look for it!"

Roy: Oh yes

Ed: Oh no

Roy: Go on Fullmetal, go to sleep….

Ed: WHAT? No! Not after I already know what's going to happen!

Hughes: Hm… I guess I shouldn't have read the challenge out loud…

Roy: Damn right!

Hughes: Oh well! We'll just have to wait until Edward falls asleep.

Ed: NOT GOING TO HAPPEN

Al: …. Brother HAS stayed up for days on end, so this may be difficult…

Ed: WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS ON THEIR SIDE?

Winry: *Knocks Ed out with wrench* I figured this would be a good time to make my entrance into this fanfiction.

Al: W-Winry? When did you get here?

Winry: When ShadowHawq35 wanted me to. It's not like I would deliberately throw myself into a crack fic like this one.

Al: True….

Roy: So are we going to take his automail or what?

Hughes: We? Where did the "we" come from? The reviewer specifically said have ROY take away his automail, not Roy, Hughes, Winry, and Alphonse.

Roy: Alright, fine.

-A few minutes later-

Roy: What the hell? If this kid breaks these things so easily then why are they so hard to get off?!

-Another few minutes because Roy is kind of dumb-

Roy: HAHA!

Roy: Now, where am I supposed to hide metal limbs…?

Hughes: While Roy debates on a hiding spot, why don't all you readers entertain yourself with this commercial?

Envy: Have you ever wanted to be a homunculus?

Lust: Well now you can!

Envy: Of course, this only works in the Fullmetal Alchemist series, not the manga.

Greed: All you have to do, is find someone who knows how to do alchemy, educate them on human transmutation, make them promise they'll bring you back if you die and voila!

Pride: Of course, you need to make sure you die before them, so suicide would be an option.

Hughes: GUYS! WE DON'T WANT OUR READERS TO DIE, DO WE?

Homunculi: Yes.

Hughes: Uh…. Heh…. Um…. WHY DON'T WE CHECK BACK WITH ROY AND SEE WHAT HE'S UP TO?

Ed: WHERE DID YOU PUT MY LIMBS COLONEL!?

Roy: A place you'll never find them.

Riza: Colonel, why are Edward's limbs in the kitchen pantry?

Roy: Riza NO!

Ed: HAH! Now all I have to do is grab them. *begins to move forward but only has one leg so falls*

Ed: Whatever! I can just…. Crawl or something! *Fails because doesn't have arm*

Ed: COLONEL I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!

**A/N: I feel evil. Very evil indeed. Oh yeah, important notice: I may be putting this on hold for a few days to do a bit of my other fics that I've been neglecting, so I might not be able to get to your suggestions as soon as I'd like. I might do another chapter or two tomorrow, but it really depends on what my mood is. BUT! Have no fear, I will still read your reviews, and I will still write your requests! All in good time!**

**WHAT WILL THE NEXT CHALLENGE BE? WHAT WILL WE HAVE TO PUT OUR CHARACTERS THROUGH NEXT? REVIEW AND YOU COULD BE THE ONE TO DECIDE!**

**-Shadow**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: I'M DOING THIS FOR A CHAINSAW GUN!**

Hughes: Grizz Lee is back everybody and with another request/suggestion/challenge thingy! Here we go!

Al: Hey brother

Ed: Oh hey Al. Are we still in this crazy fanfic?

Al: Uh, yeah, but that's not what I cam to talk to you about

Ed: Yeah? What is it?

Al: Have… you ever tried ice cream?

Ed: Huh?

Al: It's this stuff *holds out giant bowl of ice cream* I can't eat it, so I was wondering if you could maybe try it for me…?

Ed: Yeah, sure. *eats spoonful*

Ed: … this is tasty *eats more*

Ed: This is really tasty *Eats more*

Ed: AL WHEN WE GET YOUR BODY BACK YOU HAVE TO TRY THIS STUFF IT'S FREAKING AMAZING!

Ed: *finishes* Man Al, that was delicious

Al: Do you know what it's made of?

Ed: What, no. I don't really see how that would matter at a-

Al: It's mainly composed of milk.

Ed: …

Al: …

Ed: …

Al: …

Ed: YOU FED ME MILK INFESTED ICE CUBES!?

**A/N: So, does Al get his gold-plated basketball signed by you and Dragonfire Alchemist? And more importantly do I GET MY CHAINSAW GUN!? I HAVE SO MANY USES FOR THAT THING YOU HAVE NO IDEA!**

**Sorry this chappy is short. But it's getting late in my time zone (no idea where you guys are) and it's been a long day.**

**Before I go, do any of you know about this noveljoy . com? (Take out the spaces) because it sent me this PM asking to join its website or something and I don't know if it's a scam or not. So, because I'm paranoid, do any of you know what the crap it's about?**

**Thanks guys**

**WHAT WILL THE NEXT CHALLENGE BE? WHAT WILL WE HAVE TO PUT OUR CHARACTERS THROUGH NEXT? REVIEW AND YOU COULD BE THE ONE TO DECIDE!**

**-Shadow**


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